Openness

Today, I met with The Couple (MY couple, really) at LDS Social Services.
My parents and caseworker were also there.
It was emotional for everyone there.
I think I cried the most, but I blame that on the fact that I am pregnant and that every time I stopped crying someone else would start tearing up and I would tear up with them!

DARN YOU, HORMONES!!

But even with all the tears, there was such a good feeling in that room.

The Couple I have chosen is so amazing and loving, I honestly cannot picture placing with anyone else.
They are so understanding of how hard this is for me too, and have done everything they can to make things easier.

But basically today (other than talking about how we are all feeling) we talked about the openness of the future and what things would be like in the hospital.

I was asked who would contact The Couple when I went into the hospital, and it kinda caught me off guard.
I mean, is someone else supposed to call them?
Because I have been planning on being the one to call them the entire time!
Does it not work that way, typically?
Hahaha I was so confused!

We also talked about what would be happening at the hospital, and I am lucky enough to be going to a hospital where not only does the staff knows me, but the hospital itself works really well with adoptions!
I am really excited for what happens next in this area.

We also talked about any future contact, and I am really happy about how open we all are with each other!
Everything has just gone so smoothly.
And I know everything in the future will work out just perfectly!
There may be some bumps, but everything will work out.

I know I am doing the right thing.
It's so incredibly difficult to place my little girl with someone else, but even though it hurts I have this overwhelming feeling of peace.

Gah, I am just so emotionally drained today.
It takes such a toll on my body!
Maybe I should take a nap with my maternity body pillow.
Now that I am bigger that pillow gives much better support to my stomach and back!!

But I know I look like such a freak when I cuddle with it...
OH WELL!