Monday, December 19, 2011

Voices of Christmas

Yesterday, I performed in a Christmas choir. We had been practicing since October, and it was so fun to finally perform for an audience. Two nicely sized audiences. From the feedback I’ve been getting we sounded spectacular. It’s so wonderful to know that all the time and effort we put into it paid off.
At the second showing my family and boyfriend all showed up. It was neat to look out into the crowd and see my mister smiling up at me.

However, the smile of the night goes to little Miss Madden Rae who made an appearance with her parents.
I saw them sitting in the crowd and nearly started crying multiple times while on stage. I had to force myself to look away.

Madden got a little bit fussy, and her dad was standing with her in the isle right next to where Jeremy was sitting. He said afterwords that they looked familiar and he kept looking at them too.

After the show I rushed into the crowd to look for them. I had a few other girls who knew Madden was there rush with me too. They wanted to see her. I stood on benches to see over the crowd and look for them haha.

Finally I found them and just ran over and hugged Stacy. Madden was asleep in her fathers arms.
I reached out to hold her and she woke up a little and started to whine the saddest little cry I’ve ever heard. I started crying with her. All my girl friends just fawned over her cry and I felt a soft touch on my back. It was Jeremy and he was smiling at me and kissed my forhead.

I didn’t know if I was ready for him to meet Madden yet, but I know he understands how much she means to me. Justin and Stacy seemed to like him too.

Eventually Madden woke up and was happily cooing and kicking her little legs everywhere. I had her turned around so she could see everything but I could tell she was smiling. It was really hard to not cry more.

After we said our goodbye’s, Jeremy and I headed for his car and he put his jacket around my shoulders and held me close as I started to cry again. Saying goodbye is always the worst part for me.

Can I just say that I have one amazing man in my life? He puts up with me and my crying, treats me like a queen, and keeps a permanent grin on my face. I am happy. But it still feels like a part of me is missing once I’m sitting in bed alone again.